Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Valentine's Day

I don't have to remind you that today is Valentine's Day. For most of my life, I have hated this day. This day was always filled with lovey dovey grossness that reminded me of what I didn't have. Before last year, I had never had someone to love on Valentine's Day. And now? Steve and I celebrated our first Valentine's Day together last year with dinner and a movie. And with that one dinner, most of my cynicism over the day vanished.

I was actually cheerful today. Seeing people with flowers and giant teddy bears actually made me smile. It seems that with the glaze of cynicism removed, I can see this day for what it should be. It's a day for showing the people you love what they mean to you.

I'm not spending today with Steve. Because Valentine's Day is Tuesday, we decided to have date night last night. We had a lovely dinner and watched a movie at home. It was a nice quiet night. This morning when I woke up, I found this on my laptop.


He got me a card!!! He's always been anti-cards, but knowing that he went to a store and chose a card was so sweet!

So I'm alone tonight. I got dinner from Trader Joe's, a salted caramel cupcake from Crumbs, and I'm having a lovely Valentine's night snuggled on the couch with Maya. I'm happy and content and loved. And today was a good day.

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Maya needs a Catio

Maya has the boredom. I know this because she attacks the television when I'm watching it because the attention is off of her. She's normally a very well behaved cat, but ever since the television has entered our lives, things have changed.

It all started this Christmas when Steve got me a new TV and a Wii. I always had a TV, but I barely ever used it. Now I have a Wii with streaming Netflix and a new TV stand. And Maya doesn't like this. Now I no longer sit at my desk and let her lay across my arms while I type at my laptop. I sit on the couch and the laptop is on my lap and there is no room for Maya. She does not like this. Not one bit. Maya decided that the television is her mortal enemy. And it needs to be destroyed. 

First wave of attack: kill it with cuteness. Maya thinks that by distracting me with her fluffy butt, I will forget that there is a TV behind her and give her lots of love and num nums.
She's mocking me. You can see it in her eyes. 
This did not work. I attempted to deter her from sitting directly in front of the screen and batting at the screen by setting up a complex trap consisting of a cardboard strip with double sided tape stuck to one side (sort of like a weak glue trap) and bowls with fresh lemons on each side of the screen (lemons are natural cat repellants. I'm not kidding. Look it up.)
I'm watching Blue Planet. That's a shark. 
Maya scoffed at my feeble attempts to deter her and took the high ground.
Creepy cat is creepy.
I was out of ideas, but Maya had an appointment for a checkup, so I asked the vet if he had any suggestions for me on how to stop her from attacking my television. He said he'd never heard of anything like this. Awesome.

He suggested that I put on cartoons or nature shows or anything else very animated for her to watch when I'm not there so she can think that the TV is for her too. I didn't do this. But I did put on Blue Planet while I was there and we watched it together. 

So that brings us to the Catio. Steve and I have been watching Jackson Galaxy's show on Animal Planet and HE says that bored cats need outlets for their inner wild animal. So this weekend, we're going to Ikea and getting stuff to make a catio. That's a Patio for Cats. Or a cat friendly patio. Or something like that. Except I don't have a patio, so we'll probably just get shelves and make Maya a perch so she can look out the window and not attack my electronics. It's worth a shot. I want to keep her happy. She makes me happy. :)

Maya is good for migraines. Apply directly to affected area. 

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Movie tragedies. Real life.

I was on the radio today. I've never called into a talk radio show, but I did today. It was New Jersey 101.5. I was driving to my parents' house and flipping radio stations when I heard the talk radio hosts, Deminski and Doyle, talking about the new Tom Hanks movie "Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close." The movie is about the son of a man who died on 9/11. Apparently, the sister of someone who died on one of the planes on 9/11 believes that the filmmakers are exploiting the tragedy for commercial gain and is calling for a boycott of the movie.

I have complicated feelings about this. On one hand, I also freaked out when I saw the trailer. I don't like being reminded about that day. Whenever it is referenced and there are news clips that show the towers on fire, I cringe and have to look away. Even 10 years later. Every time I take the train into New York and I see the skyline that's missing two very important pieces, I'm reminded of that awful day.

On the other hand, it's part of our history. It happened. We can't pretend it didn't. Movies are made all the time about historical tragedies. One of the biggest movies of all time was about an tragedy. (Titanic, if you couldn't guess.) And it's not the only one. Pearl Harbor. Schindler's List. Hotel Rwanda. All about tragic events. All recent enough that people still living would remember it and be affected by a movie about it.

When I called in, (I was Aliah from Plainfield. Haydia is hard to say) I pointed out that there had already been a film made about 9/11. They had no idea what I was talking about. It was called "World Trade Center" and starred Nicolas Cage. No one remembers that movie. There was also a film called "United 93" about the people who brought down that plane in PA. So this film isn't new. It's just another in the inevitable slew of films that will come to be made about that day in September.

My advice to that lady who called for a boycott? Don't go see it. Change the channel when the trailer comes on. It's tough. It will probably always be tough. But 9/11 is a part of our cultural history. And pretending it never happened is not the way to go. Plus Tom Hanks and Sandra Bullock are in it. If anyone can be trusted to be gentle with that sacred material, it's those two.

Thursday, January 5, 2012

Daddee-Ma

A year ago today, I was unexpectedly in the driver's seat of my dad's car, driving him, my mom, and my aunt to Long Island to see my grandmother in the hospital. It was unexpected because a) I hate driving to Long Island, b) I had been in Long Island less than a week ago, and c) my grandmother's health had declined very quickly.

We were about a half hour from the hospital and in some awful traffic when I heard a cell phone ring and my mother answered. I heard her say "Oh no. Inna lillahi Wa inna ilaihi Rajioon." My heart stopped. She has just recited the dua you say when you hear that someone has died. My grandmother had died and I had missed seeing her one last time by a half hour. And I had to keep it together because I was on the BQE in heavy traffic with a car full of people, two of whom had just lost their mother.

My father's mother, or Daddee-Ma, as I called her, was my last living grandparent. She lived in Long Island with my father's youngest sister and her two children.

I got a lot from Daddee-Ma. Physically, you could see that I am her granddaughter. I got her round arms. I got her short fingers. At the funeral, I sat next to her sister and was amazed at how similar our hands were.

I'm not sure what I wanted to say. I'm sad today. I regret not seeing her more. I miss her. I think was harder at her funeral because it felt so unexpected. With Ma (my maternal grandmother), I was there for her life, her sickness, her death. With Daddee-Ma, I missed so much. And now it's too late.

Saturday, December 31, 2011

2011: Looking back

It's the last day of the year. At midnight tonight, I will be popping open a bottle of champagne with Steve and toasting to 2012. But before that, I thought I'd take a minute to look back on this year.

The past year wasn't an easy one. Financially, it was one of the hardest ones I've faced in a long time. I've been unemployed for just over a year and the job market for editors, writers, and journalists hasn't gotten any better. I believe I've applied to every job out there at least five times each, and I've revamped my resume countless times.

I've also had to deal with a lack of healthcare and the headaches that seem to be mounting in intensity. While I've been able to remain on my preventative prescriptions because of generally affordable generic drugs, what I need is a solution to the ouchies. Solutions require healthcare.

Fortunately, I'm still collecting unemployment. While it is a lot less than I was making, it is enough to keep me housed and fed. And for the rest, I have Steve. I've already gone on and on about how amazing he is and how much he's done for me. This year would have been much harder if it wasn't for him. I'm a lucky lady.

I've talked about the power of positivity in my blog before. It's something I've struggled with, and this year put it to the test. Faced with financial insecurity, constant pain, and an unsure future, there isn't much room for positivity, but I tried. And for the most part, I succeeded. The trick is to focus on the good. It's cheesy, I know. But it's been working.

Want to know what I've got that's good? It's silly, but I'll share.

When I'm sinking, I think about my adorable nieces and how lucky I am that I live so close to them and I can see them whenever I want. I think about how lucky I am that I have a boyfriend who adores and spoils me. I think about how fluffy Maya is and how great it is when she snuggles with me on cold days and becomes my space heater.

I told you it was cheesy. But it's what I've got.

So that was my year. No money, but lots of love. I can't wait for 2012.

Happy New Year!